Harry Styles: Queer Icon

It may not surprise you to hear that I spend a lot of time thinking about Harry Styles. (How does he get his curly hair to be so shiny?) You should probably think about him, too, because he is a Very Interesting Person. But probably not for the reason you think.

Harry Styles is without a doubt the best known member of boyband One Direction and has been branded as the “Lothario” of the group. He’s been linked to pretty much every female celebrity with whom he’s ever interacted. Which is hilarious, because that boy is queer af. Speculation abounds that Styles has been heavily closeted since he and the rest of One Direction blew up in 2010, and lately it has seemed that the tides may be turning. Which would be so COOL. Here’s why:

1. Because support is important

Harry Styles has openly supported gay celebrities like Michael Sam and gay organizations like the London Lesbian and Gay Switchboard. While some of his bandmates are out here doing the #NOHOMO thing, Harry Styles is showing his support for queer people and queer causes. Remember the Ice Bucket Challenge? Celebrities backing causes has an impact. This kid has something like 20 million Twitter followers, you do the math.

2. Because representation is important

I came of age in the manufactured-boyband nirvana of the late nineties. Basically, we were up to our eyeballs in boybands in this era, and it was amazing. Except for the many boybanders who were closeted for the sake of the groups’ “image” (to perpetuate the idea that these men were available for their young female fans). *NYSNC’s Lance Bass is probably the most culturally relevant example, but of course we also have Ricky Martin of Menudo,  Jonathan Knight of New Kids on the Block, Mark Feehily of Westlife, and probably many more. This is problematic for a lot of reasons; it pigeonholes the artist and it also pigeonholes the audience, for starters. Furthermore, what message does closeting send to young people struggling with their sexuality?

Now imagine the impact an extremely popular young celebrity could have on those struggling young people, simply by being out and proud. Simply by existing, and in doing so implying that there is a place for you here.

3. Because speculating that someone is queer is not defamation

I wish this did not require explanation. To speculate that someone is queer is not insulting, because being queer is not a bad thing. And for most young people (and even most older people), one’s sexuality is hetero until proven otherwise. This implies that heterosexuality is normal and anything other deviates from that norm. Which is, frankly, bullshit.

Conversations about Harry Styles’ sexuality are important because they challenge people to see beyond their heteronormative blinders. It does not hurt anyone to wonder if someone is gay or straight. Of course, these conversations will remain purely speculative until such time as Harry Styles himself explains how he identifies. This may never happen. That’s okay.

4. Because camp is important

Relatively speaking, my college environment was somewhat accepting of queer people. (Wow, nothing like damning with faint praise, eh?) There was a queer presence on campus, at least in the circles I ran in. And even in those circles, those safe spaces, there were ways it was okay to be gay and there were ways it was not. Bears, otters, step right up–but heaven forbid you come off as too much of a queen. I am not sure how many times I will have to say this in my lifetime, but “effeminate” is not an insult. Or rather, it shouldn’t be.

Harry Styles is often effeminate. He wears sparkly boots and braids his hair. He prances around on stage with tiaras or Minnie Mouse ears in his curls. He pirouettes. And most importantly, he looks ridiculously happy doing so. Even if Harry Styles is completely, 100% no-homo straight, his embrace of camp would still be important. Because there’s nothing wrong with being effeminate, guys.

5. Because it makes the Taylor Swift thing infinitely more interesting

Harry Styles and Taylor Swift were publicly linked in late 2012/early 2013. When they broke up, Actual Real Life Journalists explained the split in two equally amazing ways: that Harry left Taylor because she only wanted to talk about antiquing and never wanted to have sex, or that Taylor left Harry because he is uncut and kisses like a snail. Are either of these explanations more plausible than bearding (potentially just for Harry, but MY FAVORITE THEORY is mutual bearding)?

TayTay’s new record 1989 is chock-full of Harry Styles references, and coming at them from a mutual bearding perspective makes them DELIGHTFUL. I kid you not. Go listen to “I Know Places” with the lens of Veteran Beard Taylor Swift showing the ropes to Newly Closeted Superqueer Harry Styles. Check out  “All You Had to Do Was Stay” for Professional Beard Taylor Swift explaining why their attempt was unsuccessful in the end.  If you have the Target Deluxe version (which you should, or wtf are you doing with your life?) then listen to “Wonderland” and imagine the freedom Queer Superstars Harry and Taylor felt when they temporarily fooled the world, followed by the crushing realization that it wasn’t working anymore.

We need more people willing to step outside the binaries we impose on ourselves based on gender and sexuality. So, whether Harry is queer, gay, straight, bi, pan, ace, what-have-you, I am here for it. He’s still going to be charming and successful either way. So you just do you, kiddo.

Confessions of a Grown Fangirl

Let me explain how I got to this point. My interest in One Direction at the outset amounted to making hacky jokes about their then-single, “What Makes You Beautiful.” (2011 Me: Oh the thing that makes her beautiful is that she doesn’t know she’s beautiful so once she hears the song and knows she’s beautiful she’ll no longer be beautiful?! CATCH-22. 2014 Me: Jesus, I am lame.)

I couldn’t have known then that three years later I would be screaming the lyrics back at them at a show during their wildly successful arena tour. Twice.

But back to the story; my slip into this fandom happened the way you might imagine–with a Buzzfeed post about one member’s persistent visible boners. I’ve searched high and low for this post and can’t for the life of me find it again. It was like my equivalent of the Room of Requirement and I should probably accept that it’s gone. But believe me, it was real. So anyway, visible bonergate happened to me and suddenly I realized that One Direction is delightful. I watched some of their videos, learned a little about who was who. Realized they had grown up in the few years since I’d mocked WMYB. (Seriously, just go watch the video for “Kiss You” and come back and tell me they aren’t delightful. I’ll wait.)

Then the slippery slope got steeper. They wormed their way into my beloved Cardio playlist. I rocked out to them in the car. I could identify each one on sight. Then I could identify each one based solely on his voice. I knew things were getting bad when I convinced a friend to leave a dinner party early so we could see This Is Us in 3D. Cut to me, on a Thanksgiving vacation to visit my sister and her fiance, obsessively checking my phone to see if my pre-ordered copy of Midnight Memories had downloaded yet. I was officially In Too Deep.

So when the Where We Are tour was announced, I was stoked. I went to see them at Gillette Stadium and I’ve honestly never been so happy. When I left Boston and realized I could catch another show in St. Louis, I conned my mother into accompanying me (bless the low cost of living in the Midwest, because we got AMAZING seats). My name is Grace, and I’m addicted to One Direction.

But here’s the thing: One Direction IS delightful. It is truly amazing to attend a show as big as the arena shows they are playing now and not run into an asshole or someone too drunk to function, or something of that ilk. I watched someone try to steal someone’s sweatshirt at a Sara Barielles concert, for heaven’s sake. Someone once passed out on top of me at a Mountain Goats show. But the atmosphere at a One Direction concert is giddy, chaotic happiness and I can’t get enough. Maybe this is the nature of really large shows? I’m not sure, because the biggest show I had ever seen prior to the Where We Are tour was Radiohead and that crowd is decidedly…mellower. I’ve never been surrounded by that many women and girls. I’ve never seen that many people do the Macarena. I’ve never heard screams quite that loud.

I was honestly too excited the first time to really take in anything other than the overwhelming noise and joy. My friend, who shall remain nameless to protect the innocent, took a video of the arena and at the end I pop into the frame, clutching my face and grinning impossibly. A true three dimple grin. My text messages to another friend from that night basically amounted to “omgomgomgomgomg” and “JORTS.” I think I blacked out from the stress. But the second time, I was older and wiser. I was ready to take it all in and experience the magic and LET ME TELL YOU, they did not let me down.

My original plan was to recap the event similarly to my massage experience, but I had a request from a close friend to replicate the messages I sent her when she asked me about the show. So, this is what it’s like to truly live a 1D fangirl life, and also what it’s like to receive text messages from me (which, sorry) (click images to enlarge):